Royal weddings are irresistible. I had the telly on from 9am yesterday, glancing up from my screen, delighted the bride wore a nice-ish dress, while trying to figure out how the couple know Demi Moore and Naomi Campbell.
The pomp, the jewels, the Queen, the fancy congregation -I always have a little spot reserved for the Royal family, and even had a scone with jam at some point during the event.
When Eugenie was walked up the aisle by her dad Prince Andrew to be handed to her new husband, Jack Brooksbank, I, like everyone watching, went ‘aww’ that’s nice. Bless them.
It’s great, harmless feel good stuff and beats Jeremy Kyle. But it’s somehow its not in line with weaponised misandry and histrionics consuming current feminist discourse.
One would think, when you look at the multitude of hashtags movements, that women would abandon the notion of marriage and relationships with men altogether.
On the one hand, they are rising up to the evil patriarchy with black power fists and sticks and unhinged looney-talk, on the other hand, it appears, women just love marriage the notion of marriage. When you think about it, weddings are essentially, the last and greatest patriarchal institution in the world. I mean a man is giving you away to another man? Its the most old fashioned concept in modern female life. Does Amy Schumer know about this?
Most women still think marriage is the sum total of all ambition, a status that needs to be achieved, and those who don’t achieve it, are to be pitied.
Look at Kylie Minogue. Everyone feels sorry for her, because she’s ‘alone’, even though she dates one hot guy after another and is probably having a great time. If she wanted to settle down and have kids with a ‘normal’ guy, I’m sure she would have found one.
But alas, she’s not married, so her life must have a big void. And its women saying this- not men. A favourite medieval misconception is that women have to get married or be in a relationship to be happy. Or indeed have kids.
Both of Amy Huberman’s last two TV series started off with her getting dumped or cheated on. Let’s think of the worst thing that can happen to a woman? Oh yeah get dumped. Then she can rise like a Phoenix through a series of awkward Bridget Jones-like disasters.
“I’m dumped. Must call upon my toffee nosed buddies and eat ice cream on my front porch.”
Men’s movies or TV series don’t start like that. They don’t view relationships and marriage as the highest points in heaven, like women do. Not all women, but certainly enough.
What’s bad about it, is that women tolerate bad men for the sake of it. Your life is only as good as the man you marry, so if you marry a twit, who doesn’t work and drinks too much, you’re life probably won’t be all that great.
I don’t understand how there are two so very different ideologies happening at the same time. An empowered woman, shouldn’t tolerate a man who is not an equal, and yet so many do for the sake of status.
Social pressure from an erroneous majority group has been proven to make people conform without question and putting relationships on a high pedestal is a byproduct of this.
So on the one hand you have this crazy talk and videos of young privileged women singing about how they can’t leave the house for fear of men, and how they can’t go to a bar unchaperoned, and at the same time, women go along with the notion that marriage is sacrosanct- the greatest prize of all.
We’re currently trying to smash deeply ingrained prejudices, and opinions and that is a good thing, but then why isn’t society also smashing the notion that we are happier as a pair? Women are pushing men away with angry #metoo, but on the other hand they want them in holy matrimony. The irony.
It may be time to ask ourselves, why question one convention, and not another?